The Only Thing Scarier Than Failing is Not

Tuesday, January 16, 2024

Primary Blog/The Only Thing Scarier Than Failing is Not

Does the fear of failing stop you from trying? Do you quit before starting because you may fail?
We all fail. Failure is a natural part of life. Those who are successful and those who aren't all have faced failure. The difference is that successful people have FAILED more, often faster than those who "fail" to succeed.

The fear of failing keeps far too many people from even trying or going for something they desire, and in effect, they never succeed and "fail" to achieve their desired outcomes. Many of us are guilty of this pattern of behavior, and some of us are unaware we are doing it.

You see, succeeding at anything isn't about not failing; it's the exact opposite. Succeeding is trying something, whatever it is, and failing over and over until achieving the desired outcome.

The thought of failing can leave some of us feeling uneasy, unsure that we are willing to take the risk for fear of being seen as a failure. However, this way of thinking is dangerous and can cost us a great deal. If we don't risk failure, then the only sure thing we will do is fail. It is only by trial and error that we learn, grow, and ultimately achieve success.

Failure does not exist in the same space as a lesson learned. Anytime you don't achieve your desired outcome, but you tried and learned something from experience, it brings you one step closer to finding success. Some lessons are harder than others, but all of them are valuable.

Take, for example, a baby learning to walk. At first, they might take one wobbly step away from the couch and fall immediately, but they don't stop there and consider it a failure, right? They crawl back to the couch, pull themself up, and try again and again until they successfully walk across the room. And all the while, we are cheering them on, not giving them grief for being unable to walk the first, second, or tenth time they try. We praise them for their persistence and determination. They learn that falling and failing are part of the journey to becoming a walker. They understand that they must get back up repeatedly until they become stable and walking becomes natural.

So why is it that we, as intelligent adults, can't seem to give grace to ourselves and each other when it comes to mastering something new? Why do we think that we must be masters from the start?
As we grow up and become self-aware and self-conscious, we begin to fill our minds with comparing others; we start to doubt our abilities. We compare ourselves and our lives with others and consciously or subconsciously think that because we aren't where they are, something must be wrong with us.

We are all human, and none of us are immune to life's challenges. The issue with comparing ourselves to others is that we only see the current result that person is having. We don't see the struggles, trials, and failures they had to overcome to get there. It's the iceberg effect. We also don't ever honestly know what that other person feels or their life behind closed doors. Even the happiest and most put-together person has struggles to contend with.

And the even greater danger of comparison is that it steals our joy. I want my life to have more joy, not less; how about you?

We are familiar with the term analysis paralysis, the inability to decide due to fear of making the wrong choice. Quitting before beginning is the same concept. When we fear failure and fail to understand that the road to success is paved with failure, we often choose not to start.

True in our health, business, relationships, and more, the fear of nonachievement keeps more people from their goals, desires, and dreams than starting, with fear and all, and persisting till the end.

How often have you given up going after something you wanted because you listened to the little voice on your shoulder that told you you probably would fail? Maybe it was a new business venture you dreamed of, but the fear of failing held you back. Or a lifestyle change to improve your health, but because you hadn't had success in the past, you doubted your ability to follow through long enough to master it. Or a relationship you really wanted, but because of past failed relationships, you sabotaged the new one before it had time to grow in fear of ending the same way.

But now I want you to imagine waking up one morning in the future to the life you only dreamed of before. Imagine the fulfillment you feel, the happiness, joy, and pride you experience because you went after what you wanted despite the fear and the doubts. Your dreams are now your reality. You have the health, the relationship, the income, etc., that once was so big and far away feeling, but you faced failure head-on and failed forward to your success.

Now imagine waking up one morning in the future to the same dreams you have now, the same desires and hopes you feel today. Imagine the weight you feel from the plans that are still nothing more than that. Imagine your regret and disappointment, knowing you haven't chased your most profound desires because you fear failure.I don't know about you, but I would much rather accept and learn from the failure along the path to success than fail to try at all and live a life of regret.

Will you find success in everything you go after? No. But you won't achieve any success in the things you don't go after or start.

As Wayne Gretzky says, "You miss 100% of the shots you don't take."

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Hi, I Am Jaime Duggan

CEO Of Empowered Health

Your dedicated healthy lifestyle coach and certified personal trainer. I'm here to guide you through a transformative journey of wellness, offering personalized strategies for proper nourishment, effective exercise, and quality rest. Beyond the scale, we'll focus on holistic well-being, emphasizing sustainable, empowering habits for a happier life. I cherish family time, wholesome cooking, joyful physical activities, and reading, which fuel my own health journey. Ready to become your best self? Let's embrace this wellness journey together!

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